According to some studies, public speaking is the number one fear of most people. Curiously, speaking in front of others frequently ranks higher than the fear of one’s own death, which often reaches only second on such Most Feared lists!
Also interesting is the number one fear of most senior executives, the fear they will be found out. It is the fear that eventually others will figure out you don’t really know what you are doing and the gig will be up. “John/Joan, we all just realized you are flying by the seat of your pants in running this organization. It is time to pack up your corner office.” It is the thought that if others really knew how little you know, they would fire you, and do so immediately.
Have you ever had this thought? If so, welcome to leadership.
This fear is so pervasive it has been given a formal label, The Imposture Syndrome. Leave it to our society to take a normal human fear, something we all experience, and turn it into something that sounds as alarming as a syndrome! But I digress. My rants on psychiatric over-labeling warrant their own book.
Sadly, some version of fear drives most of human behavior. Some of this fear is real, but most of it is imagined. As the saying goes, “There were many terrible things in my life, only a few of which actually happened.” This is how it is for most of us. We take our most precious commodity, our attention and where we focus it (and if you are not actively choosing your own thoughts, please read October 2007’s article, Leading You: Where is Your Attention?), and concentrate primarily on the worst possible that could occur.
- What if they don’t recognize it was my idea?
- Is he going behind my back?
- Will she take my promotion?
Do you ever wonder why you are so fearful you will lose your place in line or, that another will take your metaphorical piece of the pie? Focusing your attention in this way is not only not productive, it is unbecoming and not in line with the way truly successful people focus their attention (and I am assuming you want to count yourself among this group).
It is my experience that when professionals act primarily from fear, they behave and perform poorly. When we are fearful, we think, at some level, others are out to get us and we need to protect ourselves (Can anyone say Chip on our Shoulder?). This leads to mistrust, the withholding of information, politicking, secrecy, and defensiveness – all unattractive, damaging, and career-derailing qualities.
I want you to consider this: No one can take what is truly yours.
Right now, if we could level the playing field and give everyone one hundred dollars. Within a year, the rich would be rich and the poor would be poor. Why? Because the rich are rich because they are people who know how to create wealth (material and otherwise); they have within them something which can never be taken.
Similarly, no one can take away what you truly own or what you know. Do you believe this? Do you trust that if you focus only on doing what is right and in the very best interest of the people you work with, the business you represent, and the larger community to which you are responsible, that your value will be known and rewarded? Do you think I am being naïve?
Of course, I do not doubt that you can spend years working on something only to have another take credit for it or to learn that your project is cancelled and, by the way, your last day is Friday. Yes, this can and does happen, but only in the short term. In the long run, good intentions and hard work are never in vain.
My invitation?
Become less concerned with what others are doing and more concern with what you can and must do. Make your aim to become a better person than you were yesterday and, a better leader for those to whom you are responsible. Focus on becoming the kind of person and professional worthy of your own highest respect. As Mother Teresa would have us remember, “It was never between you and them anyways”.
“I want you to listen to what your conscious commands you to do and go on to carry it out to the best of your knowledge. Then you will live to see that in the long run – in the long run, I say! – success will follow you precisely because you had forgotten to think of it.”
– Victor Frankl, Man’s Search for Meaning
Recommended Reading:
- “Anyway” poem by Mother Teresa
- The Possibilities of Organization by Barry Oshry
- The Art of Power by Thich Nhat Hanh
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