Doctors, Lawyers, Leaders, Coaches.

I recently ran into an old friend from high school. It was great to see him; he was exactly as I remembered: friendly, easy-going and (still) easy on the eyes.

In our brief conversation, he asked what I had been up to (for the past almost 20 years) and so I shared a couple of details of my life, including the fact that I now worked as an executive coach. He said he had heard about coaching and thought it sounded like a great gig. I said it was. We moved onto other topics and then parted ways, both of us no doubt marveling at the passage of time.

A week later, I received a phone call. It was my friend. He decided that he too would like to start a coaching practice. “Well,” I said, “I am sure you would be very talented as a coach, but you should know, I actually went to school for over ten years to do what I do.”

Initially, I was offended he thought so little about what it took for me to be successful in my profession. However, with the rise in popularity of coaching during the last decade, and the numerous schools that popped up to capitalize on that popularity (some promoting 2-week courses), I realized I really couldn’t fault his (mis)perception.

The experience made me think about the leaders with whom I work. And, I wondered if at least one of the many challenges facing my clients could be the result of them not thinking of leadership as a profession and, as their profession.

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On Becoming Fearless …

According to some studies, public speaking is the number one fear of most people. Curiously, speaking in front of others frequently ranks higher than the fear of one’s own death, which often reaches only second on such Most Feared lists!

Also interesting is the number one fear of most senior executives, the fear they will be found out. It is the fear that eventually others will figure out you don’t really know what you are doing and the gig will be up. “John/Joan, we all just realized you are flying by the seat of your pants in running this organization. It is time to pack up your corner office.” It is the thought that if others really knew how little you know, they would fire you, and do so immediately.

Have you ever had this thought? If so, welcome to leadership.

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Can we please move on?

Lately I have found myself having a similar conversation with a number of clients. The conversation begins with my client stating they want to increase their visibility within their organization and better position themselves to work at a more senior, strategic level. They want to be noticed and earmarked for succession by supervisors; to be seen as a thought leader by peers; and, ultimately, to position themselves as someone ready to participate in the larger decisions facing the company.

What is surprising to me is that these are the same people who will either completely fail to show for one of our scheduled sessions; send an email stating they need to reschedule at a minutes notice, or; arrive late and unprepared for our time together, and, then fail to apologize for their lack of professionalism.

I often find that the way a client manages their time with me is indicative of how they manage themselves with others. Therefore, some of the behavior I experience is serious cause for concern. If my client is unable to successfully arrive at our meeting – on time, prepared, and having followed through on the commitments they made at our last meeting – it is almost guaranteed that they engage in this (poor) behavior with others. How then are they to be seen as the kind of person and professional ready for more responsibility? Perhaps they are unaware of how some of their behavior is negatively impacting their professional advancement?

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Leadership Today. How much do others want to help you?

Lately I have been thinking about what makes a leader in today’s world.

 

Are we a leader simply because others report to us, or because we are responsible for an area of the business? Are we a leader because we have a future vision that no one else seems to be able to see just yet? Or, is the answer that we are only a leader when it is that others are following? After all, how can we call ourselves a leader if, when we turn around, no one is following us or the initiatives we need them to support?

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2009: The Year of Opportunity

Welcome to 2009.

As you think of the year ahead, what are your first thoughts? Before reading further, take out a blank sheet of paper and write them down. Write all the thoughts you have about the coming year. Do not censor yourself – simply capture whatever comes to mind on paper so that you can more fully know in what direction you are focused.

Ø     Write about what you believe 2009 will mean for you personally (think of your health, finances, relationships, career, spiritual and personal development);

Ø     Write about what you believe it will mean for your family (your partner, your children, and other loved ones); and finally,

Ø     Write about the implications you believe 2009 will have on your organization (your company’s brand, bottom line, long-term future, and access to resources and opportunities).

 

Now, reflect on everything you wrote.

 

As you read over your thoughts and see them in black and white, how do you feel? Are you excited at what you believe lies ahead? Or, do you find yourself anxious, fearful and overwhelmed? Perhaps you experience some combination of the two. 

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When the boss needs training – How HR can handle this dicey issue.

It is 10am and you have already completed a solid three hours at the office. You know it will be a long day and you will likely only complete a third of all you need to do. The ping of emails has become your constant companion.

As you reflect upon the week ahead, the state of the economy, and that recent difficult conversation, a moment of fear, mixed with overwhelm washes over you. “How will I make all of this work?” You realize you are simply exhausted.

At that moment, you receive notice from HR regarding a Two-Day Development Event. In disbelief, you again begin talking to yourself – this time out loud,

“They must be kidding. Who can attend training at a time like this? They truly have no idea what I am up against. I will just have to get out of it.”

 

If the above scenario is the reality of so many senior leaders (and I propose that it is), how do you as a human resource professional convince the boss to actively engage in the development initiatives you believe are critical to her and your organization’s long term success? This is an important question, and one that perhaps Marshall McLuhan unknowingly answered in 1964 when he coined the phrase, “The medium is the message”.

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Organizational Mastery

It took me two years to get it.

Two years of being continually frustrated! It felt like I was always waiting.

Waiting for things to stabilize; waiting for systems and processes to be in place; waiting for resources to be available; waiting for the new hires to finally get up to speed so that we could move forward. I waited for over two years for a day that never arrived.

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The Inner Work of Leadership – A tribute to my mother, a year after her death

This is an article I wrote a year ago. It captures what I believe is the inner work that all truly effective leaders must do at some point.

 

Leadership development is self development … 

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A Secret? Really?

Gravity exists whether we believe in it or not, as does the Law of Attraction, which the movie The Secret has popularized.

 

Now, I recognize there is a great deal of debate about the movie, and perhaps even more criticism regarding how the movie communicated the law, however, what cannot be debated is the evidence for the law’s existence.

 

Like gravity, the Law of Attraction does not need you to believe in it in order to operate. And, I have to say, I am extremely doubtful there is a single successful person who does not realize that what they put out they will get back (otherwise know as the Law of Attraction). Approach people with mistrust, and you will be mistrusted. Approach others with disrespect, and will be disrespected. Thankfully, the opposite is also true.

 

This is not rocket science and, it should not be a secret.

 

What I believe is not well understood is at what fundamental level this law operates: the thoughts we think matter! People know what we really think of them – just as we know what others truly think of us. We can feel it. We know when others think well of us – and we know it when they do not. Consider the vast implications of this.

 

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Real Relationship Capacity.

Why are we so afraid to talk with our people about what is really going on with them?

Is it that we believe personal matters have no role in the workplace? Or, is the truth of the matter that we are afraid of the answers we might get if we dared ask the real questions begging to be asked; afraid of the discomfort we would experience at having to realize how ineffective we are at interacting with others on a personal level?

We reason that handling another’s personal challenges is not our job – and perhaps it is not. However, as often as professional challenges impede performance, personal challenges are at the root. Pretending the case is otherwise is simply naïve.

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